« Yours sincerely, Madam. »
Even then. Even against him.
She wrote in her own spelling. With her own grammar. With her own dignity.
These letters have not been corrected. They have been preserved exactly as they are — because that is exactly how they must be read.
Jacqueline's voice. Intact.
Ahmed,
I am writing this letter because I cannot take this situation anymore. It is weighing on me too much. It took you 27 years of marriage to think I had every fault in the world, that I was ugly and wrinkled. Yet when you married me, I was like a doll.
If I am ill, it is because of you. You are not human. You never supported me. I cannot stand executing your orders any longer. You will never find a woman who respects you the way I have. I have always respected you in front of others.
Ahmed, you have destroyed me. You and your family. But I leave that to God to judge.
I could have had other children, but your mother made them all fall. May God punish you for that.
All of this, I leave in God's hands.
Ahmed,
This is the second letter I am writing to you. I have now made a good decision: I no longer want to live with you, a monster. You have hurt me so much. I feel nothing for you anymore. You destroyed the love I had for you. I regret all those years spent with you, where I lost my youth and my beauty.
Don't worry, I will never use witchcraft, because I feel nothing for you anymore. I thank God and Solange.
Never forget: it was Yamina who left you. All these years, my name never appeared on your accounts.
Thank God.
Maître Praton,
I am writing to you because I wish to divorce. Since October 1999, the evening when my doctor told me over the phone that I had breast cancer, I have been appalled by my husband's behaviour. While I was in a state of shock, my husband calmly continued eating his dinner. And from that point on, the nightmare began.
I had no support. He never accompanied me to the hospital. I had to take the train alone with my suitcase all the way to Montpellier for an operation. I fought alone.
He tells me he is in charge because he pays the rent. Married life is no longer possible. My husband despises me, ignores me, as if I did not exist.
I need peace and quiet to recover. I am requesting an urgent decision for separate residences and maintenance for my daughter and me.
These three letters were found after her death. Not all of them had been sent. They were there, among her belongings.
She signed her letters to her husband with her Muslim name — Yamina. She signed her letter to the lawyer: Yours sincerely, Madam. Even then. Even against him.
« All of this, I leave in God's hands. »